• I would mostly just like to pretend this list never happened.
• I also wish One Direction had never happened to my life.

(P.S. Thanks to k8 for the gif)

(Fics 1-28) (29-46)

47. When You Come ‘Round Again - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson - Phil doesn’t remember his boyfriend. Featuring a Magical Plot Device, misunderstandings, sex, and chili (not necessarily in that order).
48. Clean and Jerk - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson - When Phil comes back, Clint’s not exactly… subtle about his enthusiasm.
49. A Different Kind of Love Story - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson- He doesn’t delude himself. He knows that the life he leads, the life of an agent, isn’t fair to a romantic partner.
50. Tea and Sympathy - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson - Clint Barton is having a bad day. Tea and sympathy help. So does a kiss.
51. Disclosures - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson - Phil Coulson is miserable, distrusted by most of SHIELD, and still doesn’t remember why. It’s only going to get worse before it gets better.
52. Lightning Strikes (The Pages Keep On Turning) - The Avengers, Thor/Loki - “We are brothers, we’re meant to care for each other.”
53. Make Out Kids - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - The don’t talk about the scar on Mickey’s thigh and how it makes them feel except when Ian grabs it mid-fuck and Mickey punches him in the kidney afterwards.
54. I Will Play My Game Beneath The Spin Light - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - When Mickey says ‘shotgun’ Ian immediately conjures up images of them sharing a joint, Mickey blowing smoke into his mouth, their lips barely grazing.
55. Suckers Lose Themselves In The Games They Love To Play - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - People always take a step away from what is true.
56. Said You Wanted To, Then Kissed the Gun - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - Mickey’s not into any romantic shit, never has been.
57. This Is Tonight’s Top Story - SNL, Seth/Stefon - Seth Meyers’ last night hosting Weekend Update.
58. Like You’re Dying For This - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - “He said to me,” Boyd tells Raylan. “If you weren’t in bed with me already, he was just gonna have to put you there.” Raylan laughs, but it sounds hollow and toneless. “Shit,” he says. “What a psycho.
59. Sounds Like A Love Story - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - “Nearly died down a mineshaft together, didn’t we? We ain’t been the best of friends, but there were - good times.”
60. Springtime - Shameless US, Lip/Mandy - Lip had done his best to stomp down the slow flush of jealousy every time he’d seen his brother sprawled out on the living room floor with Mandy, or pressed up against each other from shoulder to hip in Ian’s narrow bed, or just shoving each other around for the hell of it, laughing as they walked down the street.
61. These tornadoes are for you - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - You wanted to be in love and he happened to get in the way.
62. Summer Smoke - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - Ian locks the front door, turning the sign around to closed. “Mickey, can you check the back aisles?”
63. Six Times They Never Got Married - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - “We ain’t fuckin’ married. I’m not gonna kiss you or hold your hand or any of that shit. Got it?”
64. Tundra of Our Skin - Shameless US, Ian/Mickey - There are bruises on Mickey’s hips where he swears he doesn’t remember Ian touching.
65. And Show Me Why You Deserve To Have It All - One Direction, girl!Harry/Niall -Genetics could go eat a dick as far as Harry is concerned. He just wishes he still had one.
66. Too Many Legs Under The Table - One Direction, OT5, Liam/Zayn Harry/Louis Harry/Niall Liam/Louis
67. But In The Back Of My Top I’m Writing Songs About We - One Direction, Liam/Zayn - Liam imagines watching him try to light the bowl is like a comedy of errors.
68. There’s Something About You (That Makes Me Feel Alive) - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Harry is sixteen. Harry is sixteen. They go for a walk on his step-dad’s property, skipping through the fields Liam had lorded over the night before – ever the hero.
69. Hollywood Infection - One Direction, Harry/Louis - It rains. Harry’s bored. Then he gets an idea.
70. As School Boys From Their Books - One Direction, Harry/Louis - It’s January and Louis’s on his last school trip to Manchester. He meets Harry.
71. Open Arms - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Christmas at the Tomlinson’s didn’t turn out the way anyone had hoped.
72. A Summer’s Day - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Harry is touchable, Louis is handsy. The sun is shining.
73. Untitled - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Human warmth, no matter where it came from, was always comforting.
74. Play a Chord - One Direction, Harry/Louis - As it turns out, being best friends with kissing doesn’t really change their relationship.
75. There Is Only You - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Louis misses Harry’s voice while they’ve all gone home on holiday.
76. Never Mind the Furthermore - One Direction, Harry/Louis - “We are just friends,” Louis states, an annoyed edge to his voice. “We’re just friends who sometimes have phone sex. It’s not a big deal.”
77. For The Bold - One Direction, Harry/Louis -  Harry and Louis are still in the honeymoon stage and being separated is hard, okay?
78. I’ve Got My Rock Moves - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Louis hadn’t really considered that this could happen to him. He hadn’t expected X-FACTOR either though and maybe that should have taught him. But really, there was absolutely no way to expect Harry Styles.
79. Ooh, Ooh, The Damage Done - One Direction, Harry/Liam - ”Talk dirty to me, baby…” Harry slurs, kissing Liam like he’s using him as something to lean on, wrapping arms around him absently and clinging, dragging Liam into a half-sway to music they can’t hear now they’re outside.
80. Drunk On You - One Direction, Harry/Louis - “Sorry for the Adele thing,” Harry mumbles, a hiccup escaping his lips. “Would much rather snog you.”
81. Right To The Bone - One Direction, Harry/Louis - Harry decides to test how Louis reacts to the name ‘Boo Bear’ in various situations.
82. Tentatively (Drabbles) - One Direction, Liam/Louis, Harry/Liam, Harry/Zayn, Louis/Zayn, Harry/Louis, Niall/Louis
83. The Needle and The Thread - One Direction, Liam/Louis - It’s kind of challenging, being attracted to Liam Payne without potentially traumatizing him.
84. Islands In The Sea - One Direction, Liam/Louis - Liam watches Louis watch him.
85. You Break Me Down - One Direction, Harry/Liam - Harry pushes. Liam pushes back.
86. At The Center Of A Story - One Direction, Liam/Louis - “It’s not Liam’s fault that he’s kind of a slut, apparently, when he’s drunk.”
87. Probably Bad Luck Anyway - One Direction, Liam/Louis - Louis wakes up and knows, instinctively, that he has to move somewhere to his right or he will die.
88. From Euphoria - One Direction, OT5 - Their first night in the X Factor house. Sleep is elusive. 
89. Delicacies - One Direction, Harry/Liam/Louis - Liam is confused, Louis is confusing, and Harry is Harry. 
90. This Is Not Everything - One Direction, Liam/Louis/Zayn - Louis’s not very good at keeping his mouth shut. Luckily for him, neither is Liam.
91. Flicker From Person to Place - One Direction, Harry/Louis - When Louis gets nervous, he says ridiculous things.
92. Merrier The More - One Direction, Harry/Liam/Louis - Zayn’s protests that he never wants to know anything about their sex lives, ta very much are cut off when Louis turns back to Liam and says, “So, babes, fancy a threesome with me and Hazza later?” and puts his hand on Liam’s knee, squeezing it. Liam looks like he might have a stroke.
93. Love The Lie That You Live If It Gives Love Back - One Direction, Harry/Liam/Louis/Niall, Liam/Louis, Harry/Niall - The one where Louis, Harry and Liam appear to be in a dysfunctional relationship, no one understands anyone else, Niall somehow gets involved, and Zayn is… pretty. 
94. 5 Drabbles/Ficlets - One Direction
95. Dreaming a Sympathetic Wish - One Direction, Liam/Louis - Liam is a robot. No, really.
96. Of Your Potential Kiss - One Direction, Harry/Liam/Louis - Love bites.
97. Si Tu Me Le Demandais - One Direction, Liam/Louis - Harry speaks french. Louis translates for Liam.
98. All Along the Watch Tower - One Direction, Liam/Louis - Zombie!AU (Where there actually aren’t that many zombies.)
99. All Golden and Godlike - One Direction, Liam/Louis - Liam looks at the wings and can’t bring himself to care all that much. It’s just one more secret, after all, and they just appeared on their own so they’ll probably go away on their own. He pulls a shirt on over his head, noting the way they tuck back against his sides, and very carefully doesn’t think about why.

CARLA GUGINOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Here it finally is! Weeks 1 and 2 (because on a laziness scale of 1-10 I am just above Adam Sandler’s movie ideas) of my 212 New to Me Fics in 2012.

Note: I’m not saying these are all quality fics (nor am I saying they’re unquality). The only criteria for this list was that I actually read the fic from beginning to end. If I do that, it makes the list. Plain and simple.

1. Détente - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - Détente- The easing of tensions or strained relations, as by agreement, negotiation, or tacit understandings.
2. Captains and Keys - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - “I believe it’s customary to uncuff the hostages once you’ve removed them from the hostage situation.”
3. Show Me Your Teeth - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - Raylan lets Boyd get away with far too much.
4. Cornucopia - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - Raylan’s feeling a little out of sorts.
5. Redeemed and Summoned by Name - Justified, Raylan/Boyd - If it’s his gun-slinging ways are what got him in trouble in Miami, it’s his relationships here in Harlan County that are going to get him killed.
6. Reach Out - Justified, Raylan/Tim - Alternatively titled Undercover in a Gay Bar Miami!AU style.
7. Particle Collisions at Ultrarelativistic Speeds - Luther, John/Alice - “The thing is, John,” she says, softly, her mouth widening into a thin smile - inviting, dangerous - “I’ve committed a crime.”
8. Power Play - Luther, John/Alice- Alice will burn him alive, inside and out.
9. Untitled - Luther, John/Alice - Sex in public.
10. Olden Times and Ancient Rhymes - Luther, John/Alice - The next time John Luther sees her, she is standing under a street lamp on a cold, early February night.
11. A Lesson in Transference - Luther, John/Justin - Justin Ripley does not love John Luther.
12. Strong Interactions - Luther, John/Alice - Alice Morgan sits on a sun lounger under a wide umbrella by the largest of the three pools at the Hotel De Allande, hugging her knees and wiggling her toes.
13. Saving You, Saving Him, Saving Me - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson - Clint runs into trouble, and Coulson wants to help him.
14. For a Smile - The Avengers, Hawkeye/Coulson - Clint Barton isn’t quite sure whether it’s better or worse to be assigned with Phil Coulson for a mission.
15. Kiss Me Like You Did (My Heart Stopped Beating) - Shameless (US), Mickey/Ian - “Seemed to stop my breath.”
16. Lonely Boy - Shameless (US), Ian/Mickey - Mickey’s never been too good at planning ahead.
17. Drabbles - Shameless (US), Ian/Mickey - A Kiss, An Argument, and the Park.
18. Mixed Up and Messed Up - Shameless (US), Ian/Lip - He’s beginning to feel the effects of the pot, and it always makes him want to do things he can normally convince himself are terrible things to do. To say. To touch.
19. The Faithless - Shameless (US), Ian/Lip - Lip won’t let anything happen to his brother. Not if there’s anything he can do to stop it. (Supernatural!AU)
20. Tried to Tell Me Love was Free - Shameless (US), Ian/Mickey, Ian/Lip - The first time it happened, they were high. Lip isn’t saying that as an excuse, because he doesn’t think there can be one good enough. It’s just a detail. It was nighttime. Ian was wearing blue. They were high.
21. Nobody Broke Your Heart - Shameless (US), Lip/Karen - Start anew (go back).
22. Left it Running Full of Shame - Shameless (US), Ian/Lip, Ian/Mickey, Ian/Kash - Phillip Frances Gallagher, and Ian trips through the words like beads of a rosary, stuttering on the name they share. Everyone knows the Gallagher boys are no good. Everyone knows that, and they’re right about that, they’re entirely right.
23. Shadowed Face, Scattered Hands - Shameless (US), Ian/Mickey, Ian/Kash - When this thing starts, it’s rough and hollow and Ian finds bruises in places he doesn’t remember being touched and Mickey just shrugs when Ian says anything, shrugs and looks mean, cold, and Ian will pull in a deep breath and press against the hurt and the world will spin and he won’t ever feel like stopping.
24. This is War Like You Ain’t Seen - Shameless (US), Ian/Mickey, Ian/Lip, Ian/Steve, Fiona/Steve - Fiona once told him that she never dreamed of anything but not having enough money, scraping together pennies and dimes at the laminated counter of the drug store while Liam screams in pain on her hip.
25. The Shadow That You’re Standing On - Generation Kill, Brad/Nate (ugh) - When Brad takes Nate home to meet his parents, Nate recognizes his own father in a pre-adoption baby picture of Brad.
26. One Night Only - SNL, Seth/Stefon - So basically when the NYPD calls Stefon on a Tuesday at 2AM he thinks it’s Sergeant O’Gay-dy finally coming through on that super exclusive invite to that underground thing that Stefon is totally ready for. He’s already bought candles and stretched.
27. Let’s Get Gay Married - SNL Seth/Stefon - “And this reception is going to have everything. Ice sculptures of me and Seth doing the kama sutra, a three foot tall rum cake that answers the question “where has all the rum gone?” and DJ Marky Mark.”
28. Gym Class - Shameless (US) Ian/Mickey - He hates that he has the most ridiculous half-on right now in the middle of flag fucking football of all things, and that Ian is still staring at him with that retarded half-smile thing that he does, when he’s trying to smirk but looks stupid. And he can’t look away. He’s going to fight to get gym removed. He’ll skip more.

Anonymous asked: how come you didnt like this season?

Prepare for a tl;dr:

I felt the story line was really dragged out this season, in addition to the fact that the majority of main characters have turned into complete assholes.

Raylan has become incredibly morally grey, and Harlan is really starting to bring out the worst in him. He’s started to abuse his powers as a Marshal and is completely disregarding anything anyone says to him, unless it’s them agreeing with what he has to say. Plus his complete disrespect for Art is absolutely infuriating.

Winona, who was this great, strong female character in season one completely lost my vote when the whole Gary/stealing money scenario went down. She suddenly went from strong and take charge to “You have to help me, Raylan!” “You have to do this for me, Raylan!” “You have to kick Gary’s ass for me, Raylan!” “You have to get a safer job and a house, Raylan!” Whine, whine, whine, complain, complain, complain. 

Ava became kind of unlikable in season 1 when she started getting clingy with Raylan, but when she started shacking up with the brother of the husband that she killed, I was done with her completely.

I was really pleased with how they handled Boyd this season, having him come to terms with the fact that he’s a bad guy and that’s just how it is and such, until he was like “Hey, brother murdering sister-in-law, you wanna get our freak on? Cause I’m thinking we should get our freak on.”

The Bennett Family plot was great, but dragged out entirely too long. They could’ve easily condensed that down to about 7 episodes instead of dragging it out over an entire season, and because of that it felt kind of dull and like a lot of each episode was just them reiterating what they’d said/done in a previous episode.

Plus, while I understand why they killed-off Aunt Helen, that just seemed unnecessary and like it was only done for shock value. Aside from Rachel (oh, I’m getting to her) she was the only remaining female character who actually offered something to the show other than being a damsel-in-distress.

Which brings me to the complete lack of Rachel, Tim and, to a certain extent, Art, this season. These are all great characters whose stories could be expanded and bring great additional plot lines to the show (like the episode they did with Rachel’s nephew and brother-in-law). Tim, it seems, only ever gets a scene when someone needs to be shot in the head, and poor Art spent 90% of this season giving Raylan the side-eye and trying to get the message across to him that he needed to stop being such a shit.

But, despite all this, I do have high hopes for season 3. Generally, season 3s of TV shows are great and I genuinely hope that that will be true for Justified.

UM, NO

Good parts of this episode:

Can someone please give Art Mullen the ‘Congratulations, You’re the Only Person Who Wasn’t A Complete Fuckhead This Season’ award?

That’s it. I’m done.

What do you wanna bet